Eyes on me

Outlining a sketch part of my life, I’m going to tell how a change (turning point) took place in my life. I was not a sort of solitary person, but sometimes when I was four years old or so I used to go to the countryside alone. One day out, it was about midst of the day, nobody over there except creatures than human beings. Lying on my back, I imagined different kind of pleasant sounds. The sun was shining; the breeze was blowing a cooling spray around; the sparrow was singing on trees behind; the grasshopper was jumping. I imagined a choir of some beautiful little girls singing joyfully. Over there I felt secure. I was dreaming great goals for future. Was I really alone?! Yes I believed in a personal God who kept eyes on me forever, and I never felt alone. Sometimes I felt I was so close to Him that I asked for a new motorbike to be sent from heaven, after some minutes waiting I got inspired, “When you got a bit older” and I simply and innocently accepted. Was I really alone?!

When I was old, I had the same feeling, but a bit different in understanding. Two years ago, I got a serious accident. Hitting the highway bars, I smashed up my car in the front. Fastening the seatbelt, the rear seats collapsed on me. I could just call One in the name, and got silent.

It was dark. The engine was off. For few minutes I never moved. I thought time was up. I felt sort of singing, but this time not from a choir, from a cd player that was on already. I likely found that I was not dead. So, I moved myself a bit. I pushed the rear seat back with my head. Cars were rushing a head in a high speed. They thought no body was alive. I found that I got stuck in the car, so I started waving them with a smile on my lips. Astonishingly, they never stop. My mobile phone fell under the seats; I found and called my friend. He drove to me in 15 minutes. He thought I smashed seriously in my body, and I couldn’t feel yet. With an iron bar he opened the door and got me out. I breathed deeply, did some hands ups and hands downs, and did some push ups to see if I was that healthy. This time, too, I felt the same eyes were keeping on me. My memory flashed back ten years ago when I was a college student and used to teach too. That time I helped a disabled twelve year old boy understand himself and felt confident, for, my behavior made the other schoolboys be friendly with him. Tomorrow that day his mom came to me. Looking at me with lingering drops in her eyes and the face full of hope, she only prayed to God, “Oh God keep this noble man safe from any harm or danger throughout his life.” The car was not fixable anymore, but I was totally sound and safe!

I believe in God the all seeing. I believe that He sees and hears us through any call from us. I believe that even if you help a disabled boy play with school boys, or boys next door, He may grant you a second birth, but this time a glorious one!

Cast your bread upon the Waters, it’ll come back in abundant.